When Energy Drains the Room
Energy Leadership in Education
Ever had a colleague who just argues instead of collaborates?
You know they mean well, they have great ideas, but they kill a conversation by being too “aggressive.”
They’re not fun to work with.
That person is operating from Level 2 energy. They see the world through a lens of conflict. In other words, they see red. You have an idea? They feel threatened and challenge it. You ask a question about their idea, they feel challenged and get defensive. They blame others and create resistance. They’re very good at picking out the flaws and the challenges in every idea or solution.
They feel anger. And what you see is a raised voice, a slammed door, and passive aggressive questions like, “So, what’s the purpose of all of this anyway?”
The energy of an entire room can be influenced by one single person. Ever had a mosquito in your room overnight? It ruins your sleep. Catabolic energy is like a mosquito, small but impactful.
So what do we do with people in Level 2 energy?
Chances are, there’s something happening in that meeting that’s triggering them and putting them into a ‘stress mode.’ Perhaps they feel threatened by another team member and feel like they need to prove themselves. Maybe they feel so passionately about something that they believe the only way to achieve it is to fight.
Step 1 - Acknowledge without agreeing
Don’t meet their resistance with more resistance. Validate how they’re feeling.
“Yeah, not having any resources available for that project does sound frustrating.”
“I can hear how strongly you feel about there being too many initiatives.”
Step 2 - Shift their energy to “what’s in your control?”
A big part of shifting a person out of Level 2 energy is helping them see what is within their control. Once they can take responsibility for even a small part, you have an opening.
Remember to validate their feelings first, and then…
“What part of this is in your control right now?”
“Given that the leadership team doesn’t have the resources to support you right now, what’s one thing you can influence?”
You’re not dismissing the problem, you are restoring agency.
Step 3 - Narrow the focus to one small next step
People experiencing Level 2 energy can feel a lot of stress and overwhelm. Keeping actions small, simple, and focused on them is key.
“What’s one small step forward here?”
“What would progress on this look like tomorrow?”
Empower them:
“I’ve seen you handle situations like this before.”
“You care about getting this right, that matters.”
In essence, you’re helping the person shift from
“This is happening to me” » “What can I do next?”
Energy Leadership makes the energy of a room visible. It gives teams the language to talk about how they’re showing up and provides options for how to move forward differently.
Next time you’re confronted with a venting colleague, try these three steps. You might be surprised how quickly the conversation shifts.
